Behavior and Attitudes
?…It is that we are likely not only to think ourselves into a way of acting but also to act ourselves into a way of thinking.? (137) Divorce is a major change in a persons life, also an exciting time to move toward new goals and make new commitments. The process of a divorce, I believe is a great example of the attitudes-follow-behavior and behavior-follow-attitude principles.
Going through a divorce stirs up mixed feelings of emotion. Some people feel upset, scared, happy, excited, relieved and confused by their situation, regardless if they were the one who initiate the divorce. Due to these conflicting feelings, people try to avoid appearing inconsistent with those around them. They may hide those emotions and use impression-management to appear consistent. In freeing oneself from a marriage, a person also creates a new attitude (self-identity) and goes through the movements of that new role. Though he/she may not feel comfortable going through a new routine, it will eventually feel familiar. By role-playing, we start to behave differently allowing a person to settle into his/her new life and commitments.
For example when I first began my divorce, I wasn?t sure if it was the right decision due to the
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